With the nation still in shock that Liam Hemsworth so swiftly moved on from Miley Cyrus, we now learn that Miley, too, has seen light at the end of the tunnel. This time in the form of her “Bangerz” music producer Mike WiLL Made It. (This is his name, and his accountant probably hates him for it.)
STAR Magazine dubiously reported this shit even before she officially split from Liam, and now it seems every outlet has piled onto it like a bunch of Kim Kardashian wannabes fighting over the last pair of padded panties.
To exacerbate things, Terry Richardson posted a photo to Twitter showing Miley looking like she’s trying to eat Mike’s face off while in her “Wrecking Ball” video attire (before it was donated to the Smithsonian to be burned and buried).
So — thus far the evidence of this supposed romance amounts to two business colleagues doing a photo shoot and several benign pictures on both Mike and Miley’s Instagram accounts. Pretty persuasive stuff.
But if it’s true, we wish them the best. She could probably use the companionship right now, and really, what man doesn’t dream of having unfettered access to the only tongue in the world that works out more than Gwyneth Paltrow does.
A day or two before his split from Miley Cyrus was announced, Liam Hemsworth talked to pretty Mexican actress Eiza Gonzalez at a party. The way the tabloids wrote about this, you’d have thought Liam and Eiza copulated right there on the bar, got pregnant with triplets, gave birth to the babies, named them all after Taco Bell menu items and got them their own reality show. All before last call.
But while the tabs do exaggerate and fabricate shit on the regular, every now and then they get one right. Witness the photo of the two kissing that E! Online published this morning.
It was taken yesterday when Liam supposedly stopped by Eiza’s Los Angeles apartment to “give her a piece of luggage.” (Is that what the kids are calling it these days?)
Liam was only there for about five minutes but they both looked very happy together, chatting closely before the kissing started. Eiza then smiled and waved goodbye as Liam drove off. So, these two are getting along…
If you don’t know anything about Eiza, here’s the 411 (she’s also active on Instagram). She’s a well-known face in her native Mexico, and her life also has a lot of beyond-coincidental parallels to Miley’s — celebrity parent, fame at 16, starring on a kids’ network as a girl with a secret alter-ego, etc. So the fact that she’s now hooking up with Miley’s ex isn’t creepy or weird or stalkerish at all.
Us Weekly says Liam Hemsworth has once again fallen prey to icy “Mad Men” actress January Jones — with whom he supposedly hooked up earlier this year — causing Miley Cyrus and her wayward tongue to petulantly unfollow him on Twitter.
ATTA GIRL. THAT’LL SHOW HIM.
The Aussie “Hunger Games” star was already way above Miley’s pay grade (something that became really apparent after she channeled an epileptic demon at the VMAs), and he’s supposedly “mortified” by her desperate grabs for attention.
Sources also told Radar Online the couple is “on a break,” saying Miley’s “racy new look and sort of ghetto attitude isn’t exactly what [Liam] signed up for,” and adding that while he’s a “serious actor with a growing career,” she’s “just turned into a joke.”
Meanwhile, Liam’s mouthpieces earned their keep by telling E! Online, “The story of Liam Hemsworth and January Jones is entirely fabricated by Us Weekly. There is no truth whatsoever to this tabloid fiction.”
“We know this,” they didn’t add, “because if he’d mated with January, she’d already have eaten him.”
Miley Cyrus is super-proud of the Twerk of Desperation she did at the VMAs, and even her dad refused to publicly condemn it (giving you a real glimpse into the twisted family dynamics here because if I’d pulled that stunt, my dad would’ve charged the stage with a tranq gun and a tarp).
But there IS a guy in Miley’s life who wasn’t pleased: her fiance, Liam Hemsworth, who reportedly found the whole spectacle “mortifying.”
“He is over her and wants to make a clean break,” a snitch told Us Weekly. “No more back and forth.”
Liam, 23, and Miley, 20, hooked up in 2009 while filming “The Last Song” together, and he put a ring on it last year. Since then, though, things have been rough — largely because Miley now thinks she’s the black Pink. (Or the white Rihanna. Hard to say lately.)
The betrothed pair is still living in the same house but supposedly sleeping in separate rooms, which isn’t surprising since at a recent joint red carpet appearance, they looked like an awkward couple set up on a blind date by their well-meaning grandparents.
More recently, Liam spent last weekend with his family in Toronto, supposedly to support the premiere of brother Chris Hemsworth‘s new movie, “Rush.” Or maybe he just got a sneak peek at Miley’s “Wrecking Ball” video and left the country in protest.