The Jonas Brothers Dismantled their Twitter Account

404: Inane Ramblings Not Found
404: Inane Ramblings Not Found

Just over a week after the Jonas Brothers cancelled their upcoming tour because they couldn’t decide on one direction (see what we did there?) to take the band, the brothers have now shuttered their Twitter account.

None of the brothers have tweeted from their personal accounts since early October, leading people to speculate that something serious is up (drugs), and that the band may be done for good. Pretty cool, right?

So, how does this affect you? Well, if you’re a Twitter user, you’ll never have to see a #Jonas hashtag asking them to give a concert in Belize ever again. That right there is reason enough to throw a party.

tumblr_inline_mnw2qePGAt1rwqjex

The Jonas Brothers Had a Bitchfight and Canceled Their Tour

Moments later, there was bloodshed
Moments later, there was bloodshed

The Jonas Brothers may be totally straight (allegedly), but that isn’t stopping them from trying to claw each other’s eyes out. In fact, things have gotten so bad that they’ve canceled their upcoming 19-city tour just two days before it was set to begin.

Their spokesman, Jesse Derris, told People:

“There is a deep rift within the band. There was a big a disagreement over their music direction. [Their future] remains to be seen.”

Pretty detailed stuff for an official statement — usually hired mouthpieces just go with the standard “creative differences” and leave it at that.

TMZ‘s sources say the problems stem from the fact that “each brother had a different vision of where they wanted to take the band, ranging from pop to hard rock,” so “releasing anything new would be a disaster, because the style would be all over the place.” Seems like something they’d have discussed before now, but whatever.

Bottom line is there are a lot of reeeally pissed off people (in several languages, even) over on the guys’ Facebook page right now. It’s almost enough to make you wish Justin Bieber was part of a dysfunctional trio.
 

The Jonas Brothers Used the Gayest Photo Possible to Declare Their Heterosexuality

Look how straight they are. LOOK.
Look how straight they are. LOOK.

The Jonas Brothers are about to drop their first album in four years, so they sat down with Out magazine to talk about that, getting older, Miley Cyrus (who’s clearly become some sort of goddamned pop culture Rorschach test), and all those old rumors about one or more of them liking the peen.

Joe: We have a lot of gay friends and gay fans. It’s a boy band stereotype; people assume, but we don’t take offense.

Nick: Prior to us being a band, I was a super theater geek. I loved theater and I still do, and I care about fashion, and I care about a lot of things that I feel like stereotypes are attached to.

Joe: [Being in Out] is a moment for us for sure. We keep saying, “Well, it’s about time.”

Perhaps because Kevin is married, he didn’t feel the need to chime in here. His wife is also pregnant, so maybe that’s supposed to serve as past penile geotagging.

So despite the picture above (and the accompanying photo shoot), the story they’re going with is that all three of them are straight. Okay, I can buy that.

But shouldn’t someone have asked how they’re related to Renee Zellweger?