James Deen Talked to Playboy About Farrah Abraham, Lindsay Lohan and Clown Sex

Playboy
Playboy

Remember that time James Deen filmed a porno with Famewhore Abraham Farrah Abraham? Well, he sure does. And he told Playboy all about it during his “20 Questions” interview.

Here’s what happened. I got a call and they asked if I wanted to do a celebrity sex tape with Farrah. They said, “We’ll set it up so it looks like you guys are dating, and then TMZ will find out and it’ll be all over the TV.” They wanted to pretend that somehow the tape got leaked behind her back and she was completely unaware. It was a really fucked-up story, and I said, “No, I don’t want to do that. Hire somebody else.”

But they promised me the media wouldn’t be involved. I made sure they knew I was going to tell the truth if anybody asked me about it. I wasn’t going to lie. They said they’d make sure the media never talked to me.

So we shoot the movie, and as we’re leaving her hotel room some paparazzo takes our picture. The next day I get a call from TMZ, asking if I was dating Farrah Abraham. I said no. “Well, what were you doing at that hotel?” “Shooting a porno.” “Oh…okay. Bye then.” And that’s when the fucking drama train hit.”

Seems like a really exhaustive way to say “I shot a porno with Farrah Abraham and then I was honest when people asked about it,” but, hey, what do we know.

Of course when all this went down, Farrah publicly bashed Deen, claiming he leaked what was a personal sex tape — as he knew she’d do because the suits warned him that was the plan in advance — and they sparred in the press for a while. Farrah even said he had a tiny ween, but he brushed that off like dirt on his shoulder.

I respect her right to have that opinion. If you think I have a small penis, that’s fine. I don’t care. I’m not going to be offended by what you said, and I’m definitely not going to get into a public pissing match with you.

He goes on to tell a similar story about tabloids assuming he and Lindsay Lohan were dating after hanging out while working on “The Canyons.” But if he had his pick of co-stars, who would he want?

That’s hard to say, because so much of it depends on personality. You look at somebody like Halle Berry or Charlize Theron and they’re undeniably gorgeous. But I don’t know them. For all I know, they’re complete bitches. Personality goes a long way.

Fair enough. But here’s where things get weird — who would he definitely NOT want?

“I won’t have sex with anyone dressed like a clown. They are creepy. I’ve done it only once, and it was terrifying.”

Check your privilege, Jimmy. Not every clown wants to bone you.

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