Courtney Stodden’s Body Is Apparently Rebelling Against Her Store-Bought Rack

It wasn’t too long ago that teen bride Courtney Stodden opted for breast augmentation to complete her transformation into Malibu Barbie, and then proceeded to show off the new purchases all over the place. But now she’s on the British version of “Celebrity Big Brother” (because apparently British people still watch “Big Brother”) and something seems … off.

Apparently, somewhere deep inside there, the remaining natural elements of Courtney Stodden’s body have launched a full scale attack on the foreign invaders. Maybe her small frame just can’t handle the extra load (so to speak), causing some veins to make a jailbreak. We’re not exactly sure what the deal is, but this isn’t a normal phenomena for 19-year-old women.

Channel 5
Channel 5
Channel 5
Channel 5

In the interest of fairness, it should be noted that they do not always look like this on the program. Here she is enjoying some cake with Dustin “Douchebiscuit” Diamond, and everything seems to be in good working order:

Channel 5
Channel 5

Here, too:

Channel 5
Channel 5

It’s also possible that — in some tragic twist of fate — her breasts are allergic to her own husband, skeevy actor Doug Hutchinson.

Whatever it is, we hope she finds the requisite cream, pill or hoodoo spell to fix it.