That Gwyneth Paltrow Vanity Fair Piece Is Actually Happening

Disney

Disney

Earlier this year, Gwyneth Paltrow freaked out upon learning that Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter was planning what she assumed would be a front-cover hatchet job on her. So she wrote emails to all of her bourgeois pals asking them not to talk. But they did, and the magazine is going forward.

Carter gave an interview to The Times (via Radar), where he was pressed on whether he would back down from the Gwynnie story, and he didn’t back down. If anything, it sounds like it will be nastier than originally planned:

“We started a story on her. We have a very good writer and it’ll run.”

Carter elaborated, saying Gwynnie “forced [his] hand,” and that all of her publicists (a whole walk-in shoe closet full, no doubt) are pissed at him, adding: “I can live with that.”

She probably knew she was in trouble when her bestie Jay Z spoke to the magazine for their November issue. That little incident likely resulted in at least one of the help being smacked with a bundle of kale.

We can only imagine what chaos this will bring. Cities will burn. The skies will open up and drown the Vanity Fair offices in an organic, virgin-olive vinaigrette. Everyone will be forced to live in homes with only 4 bathrooms. Mass hysteria.

You did this, Vanity Fair. YOU DID THIS.

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