Kim Kardashian’s Boobs. Let Her Show You Them.

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There have been snide rumors for months that Kanye West and Givenchy designer Riccardo Tisci are having a torrid affair, thus explaining why they — separately or collectively — keep putting Kim Kardashian in comically unflattering outfits. Catty as that is, maybe it’s true, because otherwise we’re supposed to believe she spent four months away from the cameras — only to show up again looking like this?

Kim’s Paris Fashion Week ensembles have ranged from the mundane to the “no seriously, what is that,” and this dress definitely fell into the latter category. Insiders say she hasn’t lost all the baby weight she wants to, and since it’s the second clavicle gown she’s worn this week, I can only assume she’s trying to draw focus up up and away from her hips.

And speaking of her hips, the cutouts there seem to be revealing her Spanx. And while Spanx may be a girl’s best friend (trust me, Marilyn would’ve thought so too), they aren’t meant to be seen. It’s like wearing knee-high hose with a skirt.

Between this and the braless floppy boobs, it’s like Kim Kardashian spent her four months in hiding becoming someone’s memaw.