Khloe Kardashian’s Broken Heart Is Soothed by Private Planes and Emo Quotes

Instagram

Instagram

Lamar Odom may or may not have a crack problem so bad that even his own dealer cut him off, but his wife Khloe Kardashian hasn’t spoken about it publicly — choosing instead to let her iPhone camera and Instagram account do the talking for her.

As a result we’ve seen a steady stream of pensive, super-flattering selfies to show everyone that while she may be heartbroken, she still looks great. Oh, she could retreat from the spotlight to deal with her personal trauma in private, but only the poors do shit like that.

She’s a Kardashian, by God. And since that’s a 24/7 job, she bravely boarded a private jet in LA on Wednesday and flew off to a promotional appearance in Vegas. But first, she and sister Kourtney and a friend struck a pose on the plane’s steps and took a photo that Khloe selflessly uploaded. For you.

When she got some backlash that essentially amounted to “THIS BITCH,” she made like a 14-year-old girl and pulled this from her Trapper Keeper:

Instagram

Instagram

In other words, Yeah, I’m acting like I’m not at all upset that my husband might be dead of an overdose at this very moment, but know that I’m crying ON THE INSIDE.

Then Pimp Mama Kris (copyright Michael K.) sprang into action, rang up her old friend Harvey Levin at TMZ, and reported Lamar was last seen getting a blowie from a drag queen while doing a Nazi salute and kicking puppies.